March 2012
87 posts
i think my computer has a virus
everything is always freezing and not responding and crashing
i really need to become a geek so i can fix this shit myself because paying someone for repairs is not really an option
incidentally i had an assignment due at midnight
~*~insomniac's dilemma~*~
When you’re awake at 6am, after lying in bed trying to sleep for the last 40 minutes.
And there is a choice: get stoned, and pass out sometime in the next half hour or so. Wake up groggy and feel crappy in the morning. Feel guilty for getting stoned at dawn
OR
lie in bed for the next few hours and eventually fall asleep around 8am or 9am.
OR
stay up all night and start to feel terrible...
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NY Times: A.D.H.D. Challenges Those Seeking a... →
adhdproblems:
ACCURATE. I’m 21 and I don’t have my license for this very reason. I just don’t feel comfortable behind the wheel.
Thanks to omgsparkelz for the heads up!
hahaha yeah i’ve never even tried, too scared.
what if i kill someone?!?!?!?!! i couldn’t live with that.
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For the Dead, Adrienne Rich →
ntrotto:
I dreamed I called you on the telephone to say: Be kinder to yourself but you were sick and would not answer The waste of my love goes on this way trying to save you from yourself I have always wondered about the left-over energy, the way water goes rushing down a hill long after the rains have stopped or the fire you want to go to bed from but cannot leave, burning-down but not...
being fat, dieting, eating disorders, etc. →
just spilled really hot chicken noodle soup on my...
oh MY whaaaaaaaaat an experience
vladislava asked: hey, don't know if that last text post is a thing where you're actually asking for suggestions or if you just wanted to vent, ignore if the latter... Peer Support Centre has a stress & anxiety support group that meets on Wednesdays. Also: don't know much about this or if it's still around, but a few yrs ago there was a house on Aberdeen St. totally devoted to an alt. space...
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trying to pass a course in a hopeless place
everytime i come to campus to try to do work i end up crying or having some kind of anxiety attack (i don’t have panic attacks, but it is really intense anxiety and i don’t know what else to call it.)
i think i’ve made progress, but just this place, this building, this university, is all just a giant reminder of failure, bad memories, and crushed dreams.
seriously how do other...
1 tag
stay up til 8am on the internet
get up at 4pm
read the onion for a an hour, lurk people i went to high school with on facebook for a few hours, then watch seinfeld youtube videos for a an hour or so
GET YOURSELF TOGETHER JESUS H CHRIST THIS IS LUDICROUS
shaaaame spiralllllll
you know it’s time to go to bed when it’s 7am and you’re reading your astrology forecast for 2011 and tearing up
the truth is out there: the next time i see some... →
girlyguts:
the next time i see some shit like “all bodies are beautiful” and it’s a picture of thin white people and yet again excludes dark skinned people, trans women (i see an abundance of pictures about “trans bodies” that only include trans men), fat people, or disabled people, i’m peeing on it i don’t…
FUCK YEAH, FAT ARMS!: FUCKYEAHFATARMS INTRODUCTION... →
fuckyeahfatarms:
HELLO THERE INTERNET! Are you fat? Do you have arms which are also fat? Are you not fat but feel like your arms are fat in comparison to your general body size? Do you not generally think your arms are fat but maybe there was a picture of you that one time where your arms looked fat and you feel…
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“Ever since puberty, ever since I was 11 or 12, I’ve had cyclical depression....”
– Rachel Maddow, on depression
(via NPR’s Fresh Air)
this is basically my experience with depression, except it may have started before puberty, i can’t remember much before puberty. although also i get confused when ppl say depression doesn’t take away from their energy, but also that...
“People of color, women, and gays — who now have greater access to the centers of...”
– Excerpt from Teju Cole’s essay “The White Savior Industrial Complex”. (via jalwhite)
dress and act like tough shit, smell like oranges
tonight’s motto.
intense smokey eye, gray scale outfit, chain ring, boots boots boots, no fucks to give looks
and satsuma body butter
i am going to wake up tomorrow surrounded by...
there are worse things i suppose
also, pistachios are expensive, and i was never allowed to eat more than just a few at a time growing up, so eating a bunch of these is like right up there with san pellgrino water on the glamour factor
also just came across this gif:
which my livejournal friends had back in the day! and i never understood what it meant. blow the horn of gondor, i mean really?...
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just attempted to tweet hits:
“Go to bar, try to follow Girl Code, even tho its kinda forgein to me now. Then the girl you are following Girl Code for breaks Girl Code. :(“
(PS all the following is written while somewhat drunk)
edit: upon only one reread i’ve already started problematizing half of everything i said here, and feel compelled to correct it, but it is almost 4am and thus time to relax and...
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“You’ve spent this entire year in bed and you STILL haven’t watched...”
– my friend.
“God, how I ricochet between certainties and doubts.”
– Sylvia Plath (via ellephanta)
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dear diary/personal (like everything else but more...
Falling into a deep hole of failure and depression is a great way to find out who your real friends are, and sometimes they’re not who you’d expect.
The only person I was work-friends with last year that I still hang out with, and who makes a genuine effort to sustain a friendship, is the one who I thought was a bit of a superficial asshole and a bad influence.
These things...
“Sarcasm and jokes were often the bottle in which clinical depressives sent out...”
– David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest (via SLAUGHTERHOUSE 90210)
Oh god, srsly?
attn: lesscensored
(via vladislava)
yup. also this is why i love DFW.
Trying to do assignment 4 for the lit non fic class I’m taking (due tomorrow at midnight.)
Just got up the courage to check my mark from the last assignment — largely because I am with my friend who is in the class so it’s less scary because he’s here for support, lol.
ANNNND I got a 58! Again!
It was a proposal for a personal essay. Growing up being the smart kid and...
everyone that knows me now would describe me as...
autostraddle:
you do you
Ask Riese a brand new thing
YOU DO YOU
(source: http://autostraddle.goodsie.com/fundraising-you-do-you-stickers)
<3 autostradddddle
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Can’t get a psychiatry appt with my doctor til April 17th.
Can’t get a 20 min doct appt with my doctor (same doc) til April 11th.
You can legally get ADD meds refilled with seeing a doctor.
I owe health services $840 dollars for being late for psychiatry appointments. It’s $120 dollars for missed appointments, but when I show up 20 mins late for a 50 minute appointment they...
Can’t get a prescription refill without seeing the doctor everytime.
Almost out. Call doctor.
She’s booked til April 17th.
Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping it...
imnotsayingiknoweverything:
It does nothing but eat you alive.
that awkward moment when you intend to watch a fun show and enjoy a cookie (TREAT YOUR SELF - try to have structured escape/happiness times) and then end up
reading gmail archives
reading wikipedia article on the idea that a rolling stone gathers no moss
SINGING CHAMPAGNE SUPERNOVA TO YOURSELF.
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rolling stone(s)(d) etc.
can’t stop thinking of the image of a rolling stone lately
and the phrase a rolling stone gathers no moss
i guess it’s better to be moss-less and rolling than moss-less and stagnant though
i still can’t believe this year happened
or last year
spent so much time working on it and thinking about it but it it is still totally fucking mind boggling.
this post inspired by accidentally coming across some emails from 2009
(not like 2009 was a walk in the park either but hey)
sunday things
-the day being sunday is somewhat irrelevant given the lack of week structure but there is still the sunday feeling
how being able to say or message someone a simple “i enjoyed talking to you” is beautiful in its directness, honesty, simplicit and lack of bullshit. how i think this is only something i can do now that i am establishing a (healthier) relationship with my self. how...
what to say when there's nothing else you can say
“I’m here when you’re ready.”
all my real heartbreaks are platonic
“And now look at me! I’m Betty Crocker! I’m Marta Stewart! I’m one of the...”
– Britta (via stuck-in-this-predicament)
i lol’d because steppenwolf wives sounds like something i or my mother would say
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i can't believe i'm hitting create post but also...
whenever i’m really stoned on the internet, i think that everything i do is some epically subservsive feminist act sorta kinda but in a really lolsy i’m also a loser kind of way.
here here i am, reading about misogynist interpretations of the word ‘party’ on urbandictionary, and thinking about it detached analysing as if that misogyny is another world i vaguely remember,...